Birth of a Mother-II
The moment a child is born,the mother is also born.She never existed before.The woman existed, but the mother, never.A mother is something absolutely new.~Rajneesh
As soon as I was moved out of O.T. Aarush was brought to his crib next to me. His didu was first to hold him in her arms then was given forcefully to his thamma. She didn't wanted to take him as it seems he would become "Kol-lengra" (will get use to be in arms). His didu & nanu were extremely happy on his arrival as he was the first boy in their family of daughters and grand-daughters. My bottom part was still paralyzed. Since I was half conscious soon both new mom and son were sleeping. In the same evening, I was feeling sick while everyone in room looked busy. Hubs busy seeing his offspring, taking picture running here and there... taking all those phone calls, sms... . I laid there looking around. My mom was there day and night at my side.
I was to stay here for complete 5 days. During the stay in hospital, I was asked not to take bath but only sponge for 10days from date of delivery while an old attendant used to give bath to Aarush. She was a charming lady always helping and giving tips to a first time mothers like me.
The first two days was very difficult for me as I was not able to move myself neither can sleep on sides because of IV and going out of bed was like climbing Mt. Everest. On third day doctor removed the catheter and asked to go to loo by myself or with help. But at any cost I was asked to get out of bed which really killed me almost.
Who on earth says its better to be operated. My personal thinking is both normal delivery and c-section has their own plus-minus points. I heard and read from different blogs about normal delivery; labor pain is hell but the recovery is quite quick while in c-section birth is easy but recovery is excessively painful and long. To get up from bed after operation I had to call attendant so that she would hold me and I can drag along with her to the toilet, each steps felt like a mile. The tip is to start walking straight from that moment onwards however it pains you just need to do it. Although you feel a pull at the stitches but this is normal. Walk as frequently as possible even if it is just a few steps at a time. You will gradually find it easier to walk.
On third day doctor asked me to start feeding Aarush; but it looked like I was not lactating so he was given formula through syringe. After taking medicine I started lactating but he was not ready for breast-feed. He did not like to work hard for sucking the milk while formula was dropped inside his mouth. He does not have to do any effort for that. He really made me feel miserable because of sleepless night from that day. He was hungry but he did not wanted to take my milk and doctor was now adamant on breast feeding only- “No more top milk and no water only breat milk till any solid is started”. On 4 th day somehow he tried but very poor job. Being first timer I too never knew how to feed. Result- got sore nipples. Then on 5th day pediatrics came to show the proper latch which really helped. And she added no cream for sore nipples- mothers own milk will heal it. The same evening I was discharged from the hospital; we reached home just before dusk.
Before discharge I was given certain advice by my Gynae. to minimize pain and soreness as stitches are done in layers - No excercise at Gym for next 6 months- walking is best excercise.No lifting of heavy things for 2 months.Not to go near fire for 3 months.Resting helps to heal so don't even laundry,clean or do dusting for atleast first 2 months.
At home we were welcomed with blowing of conch shell and ululation. Everything went on smoothly till middle of night. Aarush's crying session started as out of habit he wanted top milk without effort. That night was really long for whole family. Neither Santanu nor my parents had sleep because of his crying. Whole night I kept trying to feed but in vain. Santanu and my mother were very anxious as yet Aarush did not started breast feeding.
I experienced “A baby who has been crying for some time before being tried on the breast may refuse to take the breast even if he is famished”. We made all the arrangement for the formula but we knew if we give him top milk - it will be almost impossible to give up this habit of top milk. Atlast, on Tuesday morning when Santanu was about to heat water to make formula around same time he started to have milk. Oh! God what a relief that was for every one; soon both Mom and son were having a sound sleep after a grueling night. It took 6 days for both of us to learn the technique of feeding and to be fed.